Saturday, March 7, 2009

My Answers to "The Ten Questions"

1. What is your favorite word?

2. What is your least favorite word?

3. What turns you on in life?
Air, water and sun.

4. What turns you off?
Lies, liars and lying.

5. What sound do you love?
A man's deep growl of appreciation.

6. What sound do you hate?

7. What is your favorite curse word?
Fahk. (sic)

8. What profession other than yours would you like to attempt?
Bread baker.

9. What profession would you not like to do?

10. If heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the pearly gates?
"Good, you made it. Thanks for coming. Your hair looks great. Have you lost weight? The martini bar is by the pool. The foot massages are just past the hammocks. Tonight we're having steak and lobster. The movie starts at 7:30. It's Red Vines and popcorn night. Charlie Sheen was asking about you. Something about what kind of lotion you prefer? Anyway, glad you're here. I really mean that. Your being here really makes my day. Next! Oh, look, it's the Mermaids. You missed Lori by, like, 2 seconds. Hurry up and you can catch her before she goes down the butter slide into the warm pudding tub."

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